Unforgettable Past? Here’s How You Can Stop Dwelling On It And Start Living

Unforgettable Past? Here’s How You Can Stop Dwelling On It And Start Living

Are you feeling as if you’re passing through a seismic time shift and as if your life is years behind your friends’, in the  wrong way, just because of the events in your past that have constantly drawn you back?

Maybe you need to move forward, to overcome this wave building momentum before another one will take you over soon enough leaving you no time to acknowledge it. Because if we take as true what stands written in „Men are from Mars, women are from Venus” on the matter, women are like waves and men like rubber bands which ping away to their caves and then come back.  

We have just started May and that is Mental Health Awareness Month. This article is about mental health and overcoming „the bad past” for a great future.

In psychology, mental time travel (also called “chronosthesia“) is the capacity to mentally reconstruct personal events from the past (episodic memory) as well as to imagine possible scenarios in the future (episodic foresight / episodic future thinking). The term was coined by Endel Tulving in 1985, as was the largely synonymous term chronesthesia.

Of course, besides the pro’s, there are always con’s especially when it comes to memories that keep you „stuck in a moment” and periodically take you back to people you no longer connect to or to specific events full of certain types of energies. „There is no distance on this earth as far away as yesterday,” stated Robert Nathan, still at times we recreate episodes and even emotions which are not necessarily good for the soul and spirit and that possibly influence current states of mind and behaviors / attitudes towards people / facts / situations / life as a whole.  

Luckily, the urge to go back, be it following people from one’s past on Twitter or Facebook, can be „corrected” if we believe the saying „it takes three days to create a habit and three weeks to break it”.

„It is appropriate for people to know about one’s suffering.” (Goethe)

Letting alone the fact that once decided to live at present tense and having the others „on your side” and not „on the fence” for helping you move forward, you’ll need to work with your own self until you reach the peace or the ZEN you were in quest of.  

Beside going for therapy groups, you may try

Express your feelings about the past while talking to a friend, family member, or counselor. Or try writing down your feelings about the past.

  • Forgive and forget. (You can learn how from Louise Hay.)
  • Focus on happy things. 
  • Block your memories.
  • Start living, stop conceptualizing.Seize the moment” or carpe diem (if Romanswere able to do it over 2020 years ago, according to Horace (65 B.C. – 27 B.C.), we should at least try to ourselves).

In order
to extend our thinking into the present moment, and into the future, we should set limits to our introspection and self-exploration moments and to eliminate rumination – regretting and reliving the past doesn’t solve anything and certainly keeps you away from living your present.


Andreea Marinas
Content Writer



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